A step back..

Nurse Glenda

Dr. Karen Hew

I wanted to start a blog earlier but I never seemed to make time or effort to learn. I thought there was a lot of "technical" things like learning to write html statements. But now, that Yeats has helped me get started...the hard part is over and I can actually go back and write about Aidan's birth.

It was October 20, 2009, Dickens and I took the girls the school that day and it was my last time to see my school yard mom friends. It also gave me a chance to let Victoria's grandmother know that she can pick up the girls for me that day as she offered openly so many times. She told me to go and have a healthy baby and not to worry about the girls. I felt comfort knowing that the girls will be in good hands.

8:30 am -- we got home and watched some tv, then mom calls and asks how I am doing (she has been calling every day to check up on me -- what a sweet mah ji.) I told her that I was fine, baby hasn't pushed me in any way yet. And that we will be leaving for the hospital in about 15 minutes. And you know, 15 minutes of waiting always feels longer than that.

9:15 am -- we got to the hospital and finally found the non- stress testing clinic. After providing a urine sample, I changed into the hospital gown and waited to get examined. When Dr. Hew checked me, I was about 1 cm so, she put a small dose of the induction gel in me and I was told that I will feel mild cramping. In about 30 minutes, the gel was working, I was feeling hurtful but manageable cramping. I would rather call them contractions. I think the doctor did not want me to worry so she called them cramps. By 11 am, the nurse said that I can either go home or hang around the hospital for lunch. She also said that I can still do normal things -- I thought she was crazy because the contractions were so painful, I would not think of doing "normal" things. Dickens could see that I was in pain and suggested that we hang around the Tim Hortons in the lobby. But I did not want to, I wanted to go thru the pain in the comfort of my own home.

On the way home, the contractions were getting so painful that I don't think that I was sitting on my seat. Good thing that the ride was only 12 minutes because I was yearning for the couch. Dickens started lunch while I hugged the sofa. I ate my lunch and took breathing breaks in between to ease the contractions. Not that it really helped. But Dickens kept asking if I wanted to go back to the hospital -- I said not yet. I wanted to watch the news. Little did I know, Dickens was timing my contractions by looking at my facial expressions and by 1:10pm, he said we are going back to the hospital.

1:30pm -- we got to the 4th floor where the birthing centre was, I could barely breathe at this point because the contractions were VERY painful. Dr. Hew checked me and said that I was 4 cm dilated and that she was going to break my waters. So much water gushed out -- I have never felt so uncontrolled in my entire life. I was directed to the L/D room but I kept saying that I was dripping so much water I am getting the floors dirty. The nurse kept assuring me that someone will clean it up. By that time, I think I lost it. I don't think I was thinking straight. Why would I care that I wetted the floors?

I got over to the L/D room and stayed there til I was ready. Dickens held my hand the whole time and sometimes stroking my back and whispering that he was there and not to worry. The pains were getting even more intense that squeezing Dickens hand was just not cutting it. I started to moan and did my breathing exercises. I also freed Dickens' hand from the agony and squeezed the bed rail instead. I also felt a bit of pressure and asked the nurse to check me. She told me about 6cm. And that I am not ready to push. I don't know how much time had past, but I was barely able to speak at this point -- I wanted the epidural. Dickens passed my request. The nurse got the IV ready and I felt some relief. Then I felt like pushing. But I was told that I could not push yet -- so, why does it feel so close? I asked to get checked again. Nurse Glenda checked me this time, I can hear her say to the other nurse..."oh, she is ready, she can push now." Dr Hew came in and it was time to have the baby.

I was pushing in different labour positions, but the standard on my back was my preferred method. Dr. Hew stayed with me the whole time. I know most doctors only show up when the baby is almost out and they do the final delivery procedure but not Dr. Hew -- or Dr. Karen, as the girls refer to her. Nurse Glenda was coaching me too. She was saying things like...daddy has the girls, you have the boy -- this will be mommy's boy. And there he was -- my little boy.

Dickens said that he was crying on his way out and that he was very good looking. They put him on my chest and he cried. I was so tired my arms and legs had no strength. The only part of my body that was able to move were my eyes. While the Dr. Hew was fixing me up, I was watching Glenda weigh Aidan and then she wrapped him up in tight bundle before handing him to Dickens. He was quiet in daddy's arms and wide awake.